I’m often asked how to discipline kids when their behaviour infringes on the rights of others, or they plain won’t co-operate. Here are five ideas to help make your sure discipline is effective and doesn’t harm your relationship with your kids:
1. Relax: Angry parents don’t do much of a job of teaching their kids to behave better.
So before you say or do anything of consequence take a breath. Most of us rush in or act in anger. Do the opposite. Pick your time and the place for discipline.
2. Resist: How many chances do you give your child before you put a consequence in place? How often do you repeat your message to kids? “I’ve told you 1,000 times don’t annoy your sister?” Kids usually learn from explained action so act rather than repeat yourself........or yell.
3. Relate: Try to relate the consequence to the behaviour. If kids won’t look after the computer as they should then withdraw their right to use the computer. Don’t take pocket money away. That makes little sense to kids whatsoever.
4. Respect: Make sure your kids keep their dignity intact in the discipline process. Putting them down in front of their mates shows lack of respect and will invite lack of cooperation. Stay away from put downs, guilt, shame and other negative forms of discipline. Ask yourself, “Could I cop this if I was a child?” If so, then there’s a good chance you are being respectful to your child.
5. Restore: Don’t stay mad at your child. Once the discipline process has finished make the first move to mend any bridges that may have been harmed. “Hate the behaviour, but love the child’ is the idea here.
For more practical ideas to help you raise happy kids visit www.parentingideas.com.au
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